A short collection of poems.

I Put All My Bets on 23

I should’ve put them on 24,

But I watch the pain in their eyes

(Boys in men’s suits)

Watching the sun rise and set

I know it’s in there,

Heart and soul

Guts and blood

Like it’s in me too

I can smell the sorrow,

The regret, it’s pungent

It’s abhorrent,

It’s in me too. 

Couple on the Orange Line

Arm around her, smiling 

Sweet, thick, bubbly love

They’re happy, blessed really,

To be holding each other like

The moon and the stars

Someday, 

I hope someone holds my hand

World blurred by my presence

Someday,

I hope someone loves unconditionally

Unfazed by the passersby,

Always sweet

Always kind

Someday

I’m Alright With Cheerleading (And Other Lies)

I don’t like throwing fits

I knew they expected more

But wouldn’t say it

I sit on the sidelines

Other people’s lives aren’t up to me

I won’t insert myself, rather

I’ll form myself into what they need

I can be a cheerleader, mother, father

You need a teacher? A lover? A saint?

Call me, I’ll be there for you

I’m best at cheerleading

Being on the outside

I’m no good on center stage 

(Really, I don’t know who she is)

A Life Altering Time Bomb Exploded on Me in 2002

Will I still be dying my hair next year?

Will I ever get a lip piercing?

Will I still be unhappy with my appearance tomorrow?

Will I ever own a home?

Will I still be seeing your face in my dreams next week?

Will I ever recover from all that has happened?

When I’m 25, will we still speak?

When I’m 27, will I be unconditionally loved by another?

When I’m 30, will I be alive?

When I’m 31, will I be alive?

When I’m 35, will I still have migraines?

When I’m 40, will I lose everyone I love in Earth’s destruction?

When I’m 42, will I still be dying my hair? 

Header by Julia Hester